A Work in Progress

God is changing me. That's so good because I need to change. I'm tired of being human. As one, I am selfish and thoughtless and no matter what, I am capable of nothing truly good. That's ok with me as long as I allow Christ to manifest Himself in and through me. I don't need to know that He is, but I do need to allow myself to be "hidden in Christ" - to decrease and thus, allow Him to increase. How can He fill something unless it has emptied itself of itself? Tahoe was hard. There were MANY fun, great memories but overall it was a time where God surfaced my hurts, my confusion and everything I have ever attempted to push down. There was no ignoring my sin, my struggles and my inability to keep pouring out without allowing Him to heal and refine some deep crevices of hardship. Until this week, I was just confused in how He had worked in Tahoe. But He is bringing some clarity to my life- I am His. I am no longer someone who needs people all around, I am someone who needs Him all the time. I am no longer wanting an ocean of shallowness as far as relationships go, but instead, a pool of depth. I am the chief of sinners, I am nothing without the One who is my everything. He has refined me so much and I feel as if I am at this cliff, all I have to do is jump off, take one more step and allow Him to cradle me as I decent...I am ready to leave behind what I held onto for security- the only TRUE security there is is in Christ....Why run after anything that God does not simply permeate through and through? I love you all- thank you for your patience, I am learning and I am a work in progress - Kate